You will probably be familiar with the phrase “Publish and be damned!”, an exhortation used by newspaper editors and publishers in many a film and TV show over the years. The origin of the expression dates back to Regency times involving one Harriette Wilson, the most notorious courtesan of that lascivious era.  At the age of 15 she became the mistress of the Earl of Craven and went on to have affairs with some of the most influential dudes of the day, from Lord Byron to Beau Brummel, an early hero of late Rolling Stones drummer Charlie Watts.

Since her former lovers had broken their promises to provide for her old age in terms of cash or trust funds and feeling the financial pinch, our Harriette hit on the idea of publishing the world’s first kiss and tell memoir naming names and libidinous acts. Another former paramour, the Duke of Wellington, on learning via a blackmail attempt that he and his letters were included in her memoir, defiantly cried “Publish, and be damned!” Harriette took his advice and within the first year, the Memoirs of Harriette Wilson was reprinted more than 30 times. Keep a diary and one day it will keep you could be another sage suggestion.

Fast forward a couple of centuries and one is honoured to meet Pamela Des Barres, author of I’m With The Band – Confessions of a Groupie (Omnibus). The book was originally published in 1987 when Pamela, like Wilson had been, was in her late thirties. The only real difference is that the people who Des Barres writes about, the most influential men of their day, are rock stars. Take a bow Mick Jagger (Rolling Stones), Jimmy Page (Led Zeppelin), Bob Dylan, Gram Parsons and Frank Zappa whose wife was gracious enough to employ Pamela as their children’s nanny.

Pamela was born and brought up in Reseda, California, within hitch-hiking distance of West Hollywood, where the bands either lived or passed through while on the road. “I wanted to be close to the men whose music made me feel so damn good,” explains the author, “and I was in the right place, Los Angeles, at the right time, the halcyon ’60s, and when I knocked on backstage doors they opened wide for me. I befriended and adored the men who made the music that changed the world.”

Unsurprisingly it was British bands like The Beatles who kindled her enduring curiosity but she also dug American stars like Elvis and Dion – King of the New York streets – who is still making records today. Less predictably the man who urged her to write the book was Steven Davies, author of the incredibly controversial Led Zeppelin biography Hammer of the Gods.

“It was soon after his book came out and he told me he thought I was very funny,” she breezed at the launch of the new edition of I’m With The Band last week at London’s Soho branch of the Rock ‘n’ Roll Book Club. “So I went ahead but was unprepared for the reaction when it first came out. Sexually uptight women on talk shows had a go at me for being too free-spirited and sexually open. So I told them I was sorry they had missed out on the good times and never got to sleep with Mick Jagger!

“Unlike the Zeppelin book there is no glorification of drugs, they are mentioned but only in a negative way, in terms of the many deaths of so many friends and idols. There is more of an emphasis on things like the frequent letters I wrote to Paul McCartney when I was a teenager and how I was naïve enough to think that he actually got to receive them. Retardedly corny poems and stuff. Teenage ecstasy!

“Middle America was horrified I’d slept with rock stars but I was simply expressing myself and being honest.  There’s no pornography in there or embarrassing information about penis length. I feel I was from a great family and didn’t want to upset my parents. They appreciated my love of music and the depth of my emotions. Jimmy Page, despite being a very private person, never denied anything I wrote and Mick Jagger’s reaction was ‘Yes, I was there.’”

Away from the scandal, Pamela told some other class anecdotes: “Jim Morrison of The Doors was a wonderful guy when he wasn’t drinking and the music of Bob Dylan has touched me like that of no other artist. In fact my favourite single of all time is ‘Like A Rolling Stone‘. Favourite album? It’s a toss up between The Beatles’ Revolver and The Stones’ Beggars Banquet.

“I’m sure the book would make a great film and I’ve received option money many times. The reason it’s not been made is because of issues over rights. Hopefully I’ll find a producer who can sort everything out …and during my lifetime.”

As a long-term fan, I hope so too. Keep me posted, Pamela!

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